I graduated on Friday. Hard

I graduated on Friday. Hard to believe after 36 weeks I have finished my Electronic Multimedia Advanced Certificate. (I don't feel like i have learnt anything.. but of course I have)

Brains are funny like that, you never can feel the knowledge as a thing or a depth or an amount. It can be a bit disturbing.

Desire is another funny thing. You either feel it or you don't. It either works both ways or its not working. I personally haven't felt desire for a person 'in the flesh' so to speak, in many many years. Til now. Til then. But then, its on a fast track to no where.. which is about mishtypical i would suggest. Find the guy you find most desirable.. find out its reciprocated.. and also that he's unobtainable if you want to keep your ethical moral standards in tact. grrrr.

Anyways, enough of that.

I looked stunning on Friday. Simple navy shirt with soft gold chinese characters stitched into the back panel. It was all a bit strange to start with, like a school dance. People standing around not really knowing who to talk to or what to do. But we went upstairs and had a glass of wine (far to medium for this girl) and we sat in the stifling heat of nonairconditioned upper floors and received our certificates and our prizes.

Then back to more wine and talking and more wine. I had moved onto the red by now, it was more to my taste. Then off to downstairs to the Multimedia Lab because there were Multimedians still putting final touchings to their work plus i wanted to check on The Articulate (only to find Andre and the boys'd blocked that address so I couldn't) But Justin Shorthair looked at some ugly girl porn pics at allblack.com and he was happy for a bit longer.

Andre and Sonia came down then too. He is the Networking/Networks (something) tutor, she is the Enrolment/holdeverythingtogether person. He sat on the desk and she sat on another and we banter/talked for a while before deciding to wander over to The Sheraton for more drinks.

And we did. And things became clear. And we moved on. To Jones Bar. And things became quite a lot clearer. Then I phoned for my pre-arranged lift home, and then i did.. go home.. around 4am.

I had a good night.

Now what am I going to do? Well I have loads to keep me busy over the holiday break, not the least of which is getting three websites up so i have something to show when i start applying for jobs again in the New Year.

And now I have time, I can feel how exhausted my bones are.

And how much I want what I can't have.

And how much I have to get over myself.