Advanced Parenting: Bonding Through Music

Her, turning the volume up at each comma: I really like Usher, listen, oh yeh I love this song, arg but I don't like Ludichris' voice listen , , , Me, getting grumpy cos she's changed all the presets on my radio *again*: Her, talking and singing: Usher sounds so great, and Little Johnie sounds so sweet but Ludichris sounds like he's singing into a garbage can. Me, as pre usual: arg turn it DOWN, arg I hate this music. Her, turing it down one click: I hate YOUR music too Me, grumpy: what's MY music, everything that isn't THIS? Her, inbetween singing: geeze mum, _calm_down_ Me, snapping: I hate HATE Usher, I HATE BLOODY USHER, I'm trying to be a bloody SUPPORTIVE parent and letting you listen to bloody USHER in my CAR and you're ranting on and on like there's going to be an EXAM afterwards and I just REALLY hate USHER! Her, changing the radio station: geeze alright don't have a.. OH GOD I LOVE THIS SONG , , , Me, recognising the tune: Oh god, not more arg.. I HATE this kind of music. Her, singing sweetly along: Me, recognising the tune some more: is this that chick with the straight hair? Her, singing and answering: yeh, this is Shikira, she's really beautiful. Me, disagreeing as usual: arg god she's so UGLY. Is this the one featuring Missy Elliot? Her, surprised: yeh, it is. Me, letting it drop and proving I am a real parent: Oh, Missy Elliot, she's better looking that that Shikira - I don't mind listening to *her* Her, still a little bit surprised I recognised the song: Me, thinking of a song I do like: You know, Will Smith's Switch is kinda good. Her, gasping excitedly: Oh GOD i love that song I love EVERYTHING Will Smith he's such a babe!! Me: gonna go see Hitch? Her, still overly excitedly: Oh god yes, I mean, I'd go see *any* movie, I love going to the movies, but I'd definately going to see that. Me: oh.. so.. you wanna come to the movies with me tonight? Her, dancing to the music in the passenger seat: nah, I don't think so. *singing sweetly all the way home* Please Note: I have no idea how the singers in the above converstation spell their names, so that's my best guess and seeing as I can't STAND them on the radio in my car, I'm hardly going to GOOGLE for accuracy. Thank you for your patience cos God only knows, I didn't have any in the car. (at least I didnt say "it all sounds the same" or start any sentence with "back in my day...")
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Guarana Pusher

Me, walking into the service station and noticing the RedBull promotional Mini parked close to the door: *oo, a redbull mini - i must buy a can of V* Her in her tiny faded denim miniskirt and bare legs, pushing the product: Excuse me, would you like a can of RedBull? Me, walking back to my car: ah.. no thanks. Her, following me: no wait, it's free! Me, turning but still walking back to my car: no, really, I just bought a V, i'm good. Her, persisting: yeh, we saw you buy the V, you can swap it for a RedBull, free of charge. Me, trying to leave: Look, no, really, I'm good. Her, insisting: Just, first, please, tell me, why did you buy the V? did you buy it for yourself? Me, sighing, stupidly NOT leaving: because I'm tired, and thirsty and I saw your mini and it made me want one. Her, screwing her nose a little and saying: you know, we have scientific (at this point I start to turn to leave again) evidence that RedBull.. Me, having had enough: look, I like the taste, okay? I just.. like.. V. Her, screwing her pert little nose up some more and pulling a face at me: ew.. really? Me, not staying to have my tastes insulted further, turning, leaving, calling back: yeh, really. Her, still talking about RedBull's "scientific evidence" but I'm not listening, I've left. If I'd *had* my V inside the service station I think I might have nipped the entire thing in the bud by telling her the V *wasn't* for me but for my pet cockroaches. Now *that* would have put a scowl in her brow and shut her the hell up. Pushy skinny blonde haired annoying little slappa.
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