I'm having a lot of trouble with Christmas tree lights. So far I have bought 4 strings and none of them are adequate - even when all used at the same time.
My troubles are two-fold. Firstly, the domestic indoor tree lights at the stores and hardware stores have been stocked in the same place as the domestic outdoor Christmas lighting offerings. So, it's not just a matter of picking up a box of lights, it's become a time-confusing exercise in discovering that I don't need a 'starter kit' or solar lights, or many of the other components of elaborate outdoor lighting complexity, which by far out number the simple indoor plug-in-to-a-power-socket-to-illuminate-a-tree variety. When I have found one lone box that sounds like the thing I need for my tree and decide that 200 lights might be a good number for my indoor tree, the bulbs turned out to be so soft and gentle candle-light like that, while giving the tree a romantic effect, are in no way bright enough. No. Way!
Back to the store again, this time picking up a string of 200 (already learned that this number of lights give a couple of metres of bulbs, right?) bright, white lights to get home and find that the string of 200 lights aren't in a row, but clumps and clusters so the length of the string of lights is only about a metre long. Not long enough to do much on a tree except compound the problem of not enough of the right lights in the right places. I had also picked up a string of multi-colour globes, and while they are really nice, again, the string is only about 1.5 metres long and fairly useless on a 6 foot tall Christmas tree.
Far out. I just want four or five metres of bright, white Christmas lights for flipsake!
So now I have a tree that looks like it was dressed before dawn in items it found at the chariety shop and basically lit ooks like a hobo tree.
Now today I think, "I shall go and buy more lights!" You know, just keep throwing more lights at the tree until it's beradient and blinding and luminated! But then, looking at all the cords, wires and asscoated transformers, I have a new worry : what if I set the tree on fire? I mean the Mythbusters proved you could set a tree on fire this way. It already has four strings of lights wrapped around it and a corresponding plug for each string in the power board - am I going to end up burning down the house in my quest for illumination.
I am suffering tree disappointment and general dissatisfaction while Willo is gleefully eyeing the up tree for burning before Christmas Day.