I'm writing you early this year so as to give you lots of time to organise my Christmas gift. I have been, and continue to be a very good girl, so am completely sure you will be overwhelmingly happy to grant my Christmas wish.
I'd like to bring to your attention the fact I only want one christmas present. I'm not being greedy or wasting the Earth's precious resources by needing fancy packaging - my present can be delivered in a natural state with no need for packing peanuts or bubble wrap. I promise to take good care of my gift and actually, won't need another - if granted this one - in my lifetime.
So you see, Santa - by delivering Matthew McConaughey to me on Christmas [preferably in the style of his character, Dirk Pitt* from Sahara] morning will actually save you time and effort in the long run.
your selfless and devoted believer,
*wow, that's a really manly name!
Rosie says: I found it googling for the incident that was all news when we were in austin texas, where he got caught stoned playing bongos in the Nuddie.