Beginning of the year feels strange - like starting a new job. The slate feels clean and the year new stretches out before me so full of promise. My head is a list of objectives to make sure this is the year i meet the goals I set for myself.
In the last few dark weeks of 2001 when a deadline was screaming up and hours were few and running out, I was beating myself up for being a failure. For not moving enough, for only reading one non-work related book, for managing my finaces like a bumbling idiot at the best of times and like Gollum with the Ring at the worst. But then I got a case of the sensibles and listed the wonderful things i had been able to do in 2001. I had managed to buy my beautiful MacG4 and legal software. I had left the job at Aztech Productions which was killing my spirit by degrees. I had travelled overseas - alone - and seen things so old and so beautiful and met long time dearly loved friends. I had survived being unemployed for the first time in my life. The scary druggies upstairs forced a move but I am now living with other people which means I'm taking better care of myself. I had the flush of wonderful job offers which gave me the luxury to chosing a really good job as a Graphic Designer. My family still love me and I have a nice place to live. My friends still love me despite my vagueness and infrequent care. My car is registered and has a current Warrant of Fitness. I fixed my iBook. I even managed a date or two. That's pretty grown up, isn't it?
I'd like a quiet year this year though. To concentrate on work. To feel more solid about things in general and me in particular. I willprobably have to move house but if that's the most change for 2002, I will be happy.