The mob consensus took me to the cinema to see The Last Samurai on Saturday night. I wasn't overly keen to go in the first place, so, inevitably, in the end I quite enjoyed it. Yes, it has Tom Cruise in it; yes, it's a bit longer than it needs to be; yes, it's a bit too Hollywood in places; and yes, the title sort of gives away the ending a bit, but it also does a lot of things well. For every time the film ventures down an avenue that tastes a tad too like a formulaic-Hollywood-action-movie, there are at least ten opportunities to make similar trips that it politely declines. And it has Billy Connolly in it. Japan looks gorgeous, if you can ignore some of the initial "arriving in Japan" CGI, which is dreadful. The fighting is brilliantly coreographed, if you can ignore the pointless attempts to enhance the denoument with a CGI "wide shot" of a battle, which is similarly naff, and utterly unnecessary. The dialogue is clipped and economical and generally pleasing, if you can ignore the occasional tendency to have a small child explain the entirety of Samurai philosophy to Tom Cruise in one sentence of broken English ("You too many mind - mind who watch - mind what you do - mind what he do... no mind."). The ending is neat enough, if you can ignore the fact that it takes too long and is highly unlikely in almost every respect. In short, if you go to this film and you're not expecting much, but you're in a good mood, you'll probably enjoy it. If you go along hoping for something special, but then walk in some dog mess on your way into the cinema, you'll probably sit there and pick holes in it for two and a half hours. And you'll smell. It's like a big mish mash of several other films - Last of the Matrix Dances with Crouching Wolves and Hidden Braveheart Mohicans might have been a decent title for it.

I haven't written in a while. You may - or may not - have noticed. Thanks to other contributors you had some change of scenery since the New Year. My Christmas break didn't quite go as planned. Some parts of it were brilliant. Some parts of it weren't. It's a New Year. 2004. It's time to make a change. It's time to try new things. It's time to leave old ideas and habits behind. It's time to cut loose anything that is not necessary to move forward. Driving down State Highway 1 to Waikanae just after Christmas, I took a sudden detour to Huka Falls. I don't usually stray from the direct path when traveling anywhere. I like to go from Point A to Point B as directly as possible - I rarely even stop - but I suddenly wondered what Huka Falls was like on this hot summer afternoon, just North of Lake Taupo. It's not that the Falls are steep, or high. It's that they are so *big*. So_much_water being channeled through a narrow, deep gorge where the word "churning" was obviously coined. Take a look at this Quicktime video of the Falls. Here is another view from the Huka Falls Bridge. Then take a look at this Photo to get an idea of the scale from the people at the lookout. Apart from the incredible amount of water that is being forced through the narrow gorge: a staggering 330,000 litres per second; I was stunned by the colour of the water. I wouldn't have believed it but this view of Huka Falls is an accurate depiction of the colour of the water as I saw it from the top lookout. 360 degree view of Huka Falls

Co-worker No.1: "Could you just come here a minute? Walk through there and tell me if you smell gas, would you? Maybe it's just me, but I just think I smell gas. Did you smell gas?" Co-worker No.2: "Nope. Smells fine to me." Co-worker No.1: "Oh good." JJ's e-mail to Co-worker No. 2: "The answer to that question is always 'Yes! It stinks!' You just cost us a half day's holiday. It's as well there ISN'T a gas leak... with a bright spark like you around we'd all be dead by now."